Entertainment

A Malaysian Startup Conversation

It’s lunch time and two coworkers (both running their own exciting startups), Chris and Rizal are trying to figure out where to eat (a common Malaysian problem). The conversation went a little something like this:

Chris: Who’s gonna Kaodim lunch today?

Rizal: You hutang iMoney bro. Of course you gonna buy today.

ChrisWTF, where got? Why all of a sudden like MaGIC I owe you money?

Rizal: Please bro. How come you forget such things. Up to today, you owe me1337 Ringgit Plus man. Remember you used my credit card to buy AWS Credits.

Chris: Oh ya hor I totally forgot about that. Oklah today’s lunch on me. Can you Recomn a place to makan?

Rizal: Now Offpeak hours, should be no jam lah. Ara Damansara there can?

Chris: Cool, I got a Baucar for a restaurant there. Got good reviews onHungry Go Where also.

A bus passes.

Rizal: Eh did you see that? Catch That Bus! I saw a damn hot girl inside.

Chris: Can I remind you that you just got married bro? I was the one who arranged a wedding band on GigFairy for you.

Rizal: Can I also remind you that I’m Malay. I can have LagiSatu bro. Maximum 4.

Chris: I know your wife’s number bro. I will relay this message to her. Sudahlah, let’s GoGet a taxi.

At the taxi stand.. (not quite sure why they didn’t use a taxi-hailing app)

Taxi Driver: Hello sirs. Please step inside MyTeksi. Where would you like to go?

Chris: Ara Damansara, uncle. The restaurant next to The Battery Shop there, uncle.

Taxi Driver: Can, can. I know that place. Its near the main Shoppr Squarethere right?

Chris: Yes, uncle.

Rizal: Eh bro, PitchIn a bit ah the taxi fare. All this while I’ve been paying. If we keep on like this I might have to go take FrenLoan from other people la.

Chris: Yes la, yes la. iPay. Just stop complaining.

On the way to the restaurant, a lorry (definitely not from TheLorry.com) cuts them off dangerously.

Chris: BRO! Did you see that? The Lorry driver is totally MAD. 1 cm more and he’ll probably bang our car.

Rizal: Lucky bro I’m still alive. Kalau tak, melepas peluang iKahwin Fazura and climb the ALPS with her.

Chris: Please lah, Fazura wouldn’t even look at you. Your face look like a Wallbro.

RizalSAYS who, bro? Sekali aku petik, 10 Fazura datang tau.

At the restaurant. This restaurant not so high-end, so cannot book via TableApp.

Rizal: So how’s business so far, man? Got any traction?

Chris: Doing good numbers so far. Trying to increase my LTV. It’s abit hard to find people who MauKerja with me these days, by the way.

RizalKasi them better package la. Don’t be stingy on talent, dude! Pay your people well and it will be reflected on your bottom line. That’s my opinion.

Chris: I’m paying market rate, man. Using JobStreet’s salary report as my guide.

Rizal: Good man. Oklah, let’s go, got a meeting later AfterFiv.

Chris: Waiter, Billplz!

This post originally appeared on Medium.

 

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