Over the past 2 days, with the Chinese New Year festive mood going in full swing, a Google Doc has been making its round around the social media. The Google Doc includes a list of power plays and microaggression “thinly disguised as harmless CNY banter” about ‘your boy/ girl’, according to the description.
The Google Doc is public and anyone can freely contribute onto, and in just a matter of 48 hours, the document has been so popular that if you are inactive within a minute, you would be locked out and would have to refresh the document to get the most updated version.
Here are some highlights (and our favourite) from the document, and as the creators eloquently described it, one day, when civil society looks back upon the atrocities committed in the past, they will find this document useful (And for the admins, who finally have something to toast to).
Compilation Of What People Say On CNY
- “My son drove us here in his new car, very hard to find parking you know!”
- “See this privilege banking angbao from my son’s bank one, he banker ya”
- “My son still has to go back serve NS in 2020, he’s studying medicine you see”
- “Gahmen very unfair don’t let my son buy HDB, say he earning too much, aiyoh”
- “This bag my son buy for me from USA one, he works there say very cheap there”
- “Nowadays these technology, my son buy iPad for me I also donno how to use”
- *Dramatic Apple Watch wrist flick*
- “Eh I thought you are the one who got the scholarship? Oh, not you ah?”
- “You NS in Police? ….Oh” *end of conversation*
- “When are you graduating? Haven’t graduated yet?”
- “You’re STILL not attached yet?”
- “How much are you earning?”
- “Not married already? No money? Don’t worry about money la! 船到桥头自然直. It will come one.”
- “Wa! You so slim now ah! So pretty ya.”
- “Haiyo, drink more green tea. You got so much pimples on your face eh!”
- “When your turn to give red packet?”
- “Wa you so chubby now ah, means you v prosperous!”
- “You dye your hair until liddat, nice meh?”
- “eh your husband job so good, no need work lah, work hard for baby”
- “Oh you’re studying marketing? The pay very low one leh!”
- “You eat so many love letters won’t get real one la”
- (Just started to use my phone) “Eh texting bf/gf is it? Why never bring leh?”
- “Journalist do what one? Fun meh?”
- “Wah you so dark, you look like maid”
- Chindian person here – Aunties/Uncles be like, “WHY GOT INDIAN PERSON HERE? WHO SON DE?”
- From reunion dinner: “Wah, you’re becoming/looking more and more like your mother! Jialat liao.”
And there are also comments to some of the entries too:
You can join in and contribute yours here too.
If you are offended by some of the remarks here, hopefully when it’s time for our turn to be uncles and aunties, we don’t become the same uncles and aunties we’ve come to dislike.